CANMORE, AB—Ted Gnudson, 38, has been ordered to leave Canmore by the town’s High Council for violating section II.b of the Canmore Town Code. Ted doesn’t have a Red Beta AR Arc’teryx shell.
While Gnudson does meet standard Arc’teryx ownership requirements, it was revealed that his ex-wife had accidentally taken the red shell during her exodus to Kimberly, British Columbia. “Hell, I wear my Creston’s everyday in summer. I couldn’t live without my shell in winter. I have no issue with the town provision, I didn’t know I needed the red one. The only people in red Arc’teryx shells are telling my son to slow down at Sunshine.”
Despite Gnudson’s cavalier dismissal of the Red Beta AR provision, the town does require residents to keep a Red Beta AR in the home in the event of town-wide emergencies.
Gnudson intends to fight the exile charge in High Council.
Current El Jefe of the Bankhead Bugle. Jessia came to the Bow Valley in 2017 after dropping out from grad school to chance it in the wild blue yonder with just a backpack and a measly arts BA. As a youth, he is amenable to poor working conditions and trickles of payment—coincidentally, this makes him the ideal candidate to edit a struggling legacy newspaper like the Bugle. Praise be!